This week I was forced (or, rather, I forced myself) to listen to a woman while she told me how irresponsible it is to get married so young. I didn't tell her I was getting married in November, and I definitely didn't tell her how old I was. Telling her would have made it even more awkward than it already was.
I'm not saying that I disagreed with everything she said. She referred to a lot of young women who get married without understanding the true meaning of love and sacrifice, who are working part-time jobs, and maybe think getting married will solve all of their problems. In those cases, yes, I would agree with her. But I wouldn't say that age is always the reason. There are a lot of adults who act like children, and a lot of children who act like adults. Sometimes age really doesn't matter.
People like to jump to conclusions; it's what we do. You see someone, you sum them up in about 10 seconds, you stereotype them according to your perceptions, and then you conclude your findings. "You're only 18 and you're getting married?1?! You must be 'In love'" they would say, rolling their eyes, of course. "Yes, we're in love," you might say, not thinking you needed to defend your relationship. And then the questions come. "Do you have a job? Does he have a job? An education? What about your 15 year plan? Don't you want to explore the world to see what it has to offer before you settle down? Don't you know people change? Have you seen the divorce rates for people who marry young? What happens if you fall 'out of love' as quickly as you fell 'in love'?" And they never end.
I'm not saying that those questions aren't valid, or shouldn't be considered. All I'm saying, is that when you love someone, you know you want to be with them for the rest of your life, and there's no one else in the world who could make you happy like that person, why wouldn't you get married? Why wait? (Please, exclude special circumstances; there are always some instances where you need to wait, and I understand that.)
I had another conversation with a fellow co-worker a couple weeks ago. He overheard me talking about getting married in November. The girl I was talking to was king me questions ("are you sure you're ready for that?" kind of questions), and I said something like "I've been preparing for marriage my whole life". My co-worker heard me say that, and did not agree with me. He told me "You can never be completely prepared for what marriage is. It's a wild, sometimes difficult ride." Yes, sir, I'm sure you're right. But all I said was "I don't claim to be fully prepared, only that I have been preparing my whole life." Then I told him my story about waiting for my husband, and praying and believing.
My final point: You'll never be completely prepared, no matter how old you are. It's better to live it, learn together, and join the wild ride of marriage. Things are always better when you have someone to share it with, anyway. :)
