A lot of my strong Christian friends stay in their circle of strong Christian friends (you know, their only friends are Christians who do Christian things and hang out with other Christian people and attend Christian churches and have Christian meetings with only Christians....). I'm not hating on them, I just don't agree with that way of living.
A couple months ago I overheard a conversation one of my friends was having with one of her own acquaintances. The woman speaking to my friend was talking about how she just got back from visiting family and how she was "put through" a rough time. She explained further by saying "how hard it is sometimes to be around people who don't believe in Christ", and "you know? It's just so hard.."
Excuse me? I mean, seriously? I'm glad Jesus doesn't think He's being "put through a rough time" when He's with us. And I'm SO glad he doesn't think it's "hard to be around people" who don't believe in Him...
Firstly I would like to say, I absolutely don't think there is anything wrong with having like-minded Christian friends. In fact, we need each other to help us stay on track and build healthy relationships. However, I do think there is something wrong when we get too comfortable with our like-minded circle of friends, that it keeps us from building relationship with other people. We are meant to be the light in the world, right? People don't get saved because we walk past them on the street; no. Sometimes people can have divine encounters, but I would say, most of the time, people come to know Christ through someone in their life that was willing to build relationship with them BEFORE they were saved. What's that song they sing in children's church? "Hide my light under a bushel? NO! I'm gonna let it shine!"
Jesus' decree to us before He ascended to heaven was "make disciples of all nations". Not, "stay at home with your Christian friends, make sure you judge everyone who isn't like you and wait for me to come back". Again, I am not being extreme towards either side. I believe in balance.
Now - my other point.
When you are living a life of balance, with a good amount of like-minded, Jesus loving, crazy Christians, and a good amount of sexually free, partying, crazy non-religious sinners - it's good to have a firm foundation.
You shouldn't be good friends with people who could compromise your morals. When I say that, I mean, if you have no self-control, and are easily swayed in either direction, it isn't wise to have close personal friendships with people who party every night, get drunk and sleep around. Because (I've seen it happen to good friends), more than likely you will follow in their footsteps if your foundation is weak. However, if you are grounded in what you believe, and you have a strong awareness of who you are in Jesus, I say go for it! Jesus did it. He was friends with sinners, prostitutes, and the like. I think it's perfectly fine. Again, though, you must know yourself and know Jesus.
Now the struggle.
I find, even in my own life, that there is a struggle between both worlds. Where is the balance? How do I make sure I am staying pure for Jesus with friends who think purity is a waste of time?
When I say purity, I don't only mean abstaining from sex. I mean living a life worthy of Jesus - holy and pleasing towards Him. Where is the balance? Jesus wants us to be free in Him, but at the same time there are lines I shouldn't cross. I want to talk about that.
My goal is to live a pure, holy and pleasing life for God. Before Him I want to be clean; in everything I do I want Him to smile and approve. That doesn't make me prude. I've heard that before. It makes me grounded, sure, self-controlled. I am a woman of vision - I know what I want. In Jesus there is freedom. Freedom does not mean doing whatever you want, it means having the ability to do what you want. Nobility is having freedom, having the ability to do whatever you want, and still choosing what is right. Jesus had total freedom, but chose what was right. He could have chosen not to die on the cross, but He did. It is choosing love and relationship over our personal freedom. That, to me, is perfect. Sacrifice. Love. Relationship. We are a free people; we can choose to leave Jesus any time we want, do whatever we want, but we choose to be with Him; we choose to live a life worthy of Him. There is nothing better.
In my own personal life, I have about the same amount of Christian friends as I do non-Christian friends. And I love it. All of them are beautiful people. I would like to also say, some of my non-Christian friends are more caring, loving and compassionate people than a lot of my "Christian" friends. They aren't lukewarm, they don't claim to love Jesus and then do things that say other wise. They are simply sinners, but they are sometimes better people than us. God does say that lukewarm people are worse than cold people. You should know what I mean...if you say you're a Christian and you're partying every night, you're worse than the people who don't love Jesus and do the same thing. They are consistent. Is what they're doing right? No. Are you better than them simply because of your church-going on Sunday mornings? Absolutely not. In fact, I would MUCH rather hang out with the complete and total sinners, than with a person who says they are a Christian and does everything the sinners do. It makes me sick.
So in closing - we live in a conflicting world. To the extremely religious I am too free, too crazy, too "close" with the "sinners". To the extremely non-religious, non-Christians, I am too prude, too pure, too "sheltered". But when I'm with Jesus I feel...home. I don't feel "too" anything. I feel just right. That's what I want. I want, at the end of the day, when I'm talking with Him, for Him to say "you did well." Everyone else's opinions just don't matter. If I'm not doing something well enough for them, it's ok, as long as I am pleasing Him.
So go out and have a drink with your non-Christian friends (I'm not telling you to get drunk, and if you have a problem with alcohol, just go to be with them and order a soda). Build relationships with people who don't believe what you believe. Get out from under your rock and be who God created you to be. Stop looking down on the world and stat loving them! Get excited about loving Jesus!! And always be yourself - whether you're with the "too religious" Christians, or the "too sinful" non-Christians! Be yourself, free, in love, passionate about Him!
