Friday, July 31, 2009

Old Film Days

She wanted me to take a few pictures of her that would actually look good. I like photography if I can use a good camera. It's so pointless with a piece of crap. Thankfully I have a nice film camera (it's not new, but I prefer it that way). It really takes good shots.














These pictures (the four below) are a sample of the shots I took in Washington D.C. I love culture and history, and I love photography, so the chance to combine and walk away with something beauty was almost too divine to pass up. I especially like the one I took of my sister.
























































This one (^) is one of my favorites. It was a picture I snapped quickly while my former debate partners and Speechers were chatting away after a meeting. We all enjoy each others company excessively, and one of our favorite things is standing around talking nonsensically.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Forgetting

So, I really hate it when I stop doing the things I love more than anything else. Like writing. I have such a passion for it, but lately I only sit down to do it maybe once a day. Which is terrible for me. Usually (when I'm my normal, writing self) I'll sit down for hours, maybe 3 or 4 times a day just writing. I could seriously be satisfied doing that every day. And I could always write about something new. I'm sure I still could, and I know I would enjoy it the same, if not more now, but I don't seem to have enough time. Or, can't seem to ever get to it. Or, I find something else to do and forget about writing. Even letters. I can't really seem to find time to write letters to people anymore. Which sucks. Majorly. Cause I love writing letters to my friends. It's so much better than talking on the phone for me. And since I don't like talking on the phone, I write letters. Well, now I'm not doing either one of them so I'm losing contact with the outside world...Oh boy. This is stresssfullll.

Monday, July 20, 2009

UFC

Today we talked about UFC at work. It was interesting, and a little refreshing after the political "discussion" last week. Ever since I told my friend Josh, who is a "manager in training", that I watch UFC with my brother & my dad, he's been quizing me on all this different stuff. Like today, he very casually called my name, and when I said "yeah", he took a few minutes and asked "Who's your favorite UFC fighter?" Without even a pause, I answered "Rampage Jackson". Because, well, he is my favorite. I don't know why, because he's a total punk and gangster, but I like him more than any other UFC fighter. Maybe because (even if it is half-hearted), he thanks God at every fight. I think we owe a lot to God for where we are, or where we want to be. At least Rampage understands that.

So, after work I drove home, and for some reason was in sort of a funk. You know, when you just feel sad and you can't really pin-point the exact moment when you first started feeling that way, or even figure out why? That's how it was for me this afternoon. So, I went upstairs and lay on my bed and just sort of stared at the ceiling. I began to think about leaving home, and all of the things I have to get done before I leave. I thought to myself, after all that happened in the day, "I need to be more like a UFC fighter". They can fight through the pain. I can too, but not when it comes to emotions. I just let them get the better of me. In fighting (kick boxing) I can take a punch, and I can certainly dish it out. But with emotion, I don't really fight back. So, I need to.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

sometime's it just happens

I usually don't have really bad days. Usually my days are either boring, exciting or happy. Yesterday was not that kind of day. I went to work, and it was a normal work day for me. I was my sarcastic "up-in-yo-face" self all day long. Then, I'm not sure how we got onto it, we started a political discussion. I have learned almost everything through experience. It just doesn't hold it's weight unless it actually happens to you. Well, yesterday, I learned not to talk about politics at work unless work is politics.

My side was, of course, conservative and republican, and almost everyone else was liberal and democrat. My stand was: Obama is ruining the foundation our founding fathers set, tearing down everything we stand for, and putting our nation in the way of harm. Their stand was: Obama is the best thing that ever happened, he's our first black president, and that was it. They couldn't back up a thing they were saying. I came at them hard with facts and evidence to back up my views. They came back with this question (because they couldn't think of anything else): Who would you rather be president? Sarah Palin or Barack Obama?

Now, what I should have done in that moment was stop and think. It was a trap. With the way the news was covering Sarah Palin, they were making her look like a wreck, so obviously these peoples views were that she WAS a wreck and not fit to be president. Instead, I went in head first with my opinion (and my facts). They shot me down. "Sarah Palin isn't fit to be the president! She can't get her priorities in check. At least Obama can take care of his family!! Sarah Palin has a mental child! She can't take care of the United States". Now. Hold on. Stop right there. Did he just say "Sarah Palin has a mental child, so she can't take care of the United States???" WHAT? This was what really ticked me off. As some of you may know, my brother has mental issues, so that hits home with me. How, in the WORLD, can you say that she can't run the United States just because she has a special needs child? That's just plain ludicrous right there. I think if anything, it shows that she could in fact run the United States, seeing as how she can take care of a special needs child. Of course she's not perfect. No one is. She just has more of her problems exploited, unlike Obama.

The next thing they said made me mad, but it was more of an inward mad. I didn't show it. They said they wouldn't want her to be President because she's a woman. Okay. So. They're sexist, blind, stupid, and "Obama Mummies". They haven't researched the facts. They just walk with their arms in front of them saying dumbly "O-ba-ma. O-ba-ma. O-ba-ma." Yep. They've been brainwashed.

After that, one of the managers broke us up, because frankly I was getting a little steamed. He wasn't on my side, but he's still my friend. He told me he shouldn't have started it, and he settled it with agreeing to disagree. But the other guy couldn't let it go. He could dish it out, but he couldn't take it. He told another employee that he doesn't like me because I like Sarah Palin. And he doesn't like anyone who likes Sarah Palin. Oh boy. When you start choosing your friends because of who they like in the government, or who they don't like, you've got issues. I was prepared to leave the whole debate behind us, agreeing to disagree, but he decided to take it personally and throw away a friendship over it. So, now I've got rumors spreading around work that I'm just like Sarah Palin, and I'm a liar (because of some of the facts that they didn't believe). Well, I guess that just happens sometimes. I was upset over it at first. But now, I'm just fine. I know that as long as I have radical views, and I search for the truth and I'm upfront with people, I'll be persecuted. Oh well. Time to move on.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

do the mess around


















Summer is always sweet, with a bitter taste at the end. I want to enjoy this summer as much as possible, before I leave.

McG & Change

Change. Coming in different ways that really make no sense to me sometimes. I haven't been through enough changing in my life to know if I really like it or not. I know that I long for adventure, and I long for something different. But as the time to leave and go my own way gets closer, I find myself hesitating. I really wonder how I'll handle it all. Will I have a melt down? Will I be full of happiness? What will I do if all I know is happiness?
There's something really wrong when you start worrying about being happy all the time. It would be a big change, but I think God is telling me that I really will be happy all the time. There's a new life coming my way, and it's one I've never experienced.

Dirty Paws, Of Monsters and Men